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When life (or Nigeria) Gives you Lemons....Make Special Lemonade (with a shot of vodka)!

Thursday 14 August 2008

To Lie or not To Lie...That is the Question.


Hi!!!

I am sooooo sorry for the long breaks in between my posts....I have just been busy busy busy (shopping)..I'm on holiday so forgive me!

So before I jump right into the reason for the ominous title...I just wanted to update you guys on the GIMP situation.

So...I kind of stopped thinking about him the minute I got to Nigeria. I just didn't want to waste valuable time on him. So I went about my business and that's when I met Mr. Perfect..or M.P. for short...but you already know about all that :)

So I was online the day after I got back and he started talking to me (on MSN)...my first instinct was to ignore him but he kept sending messages and I decided it wouldn't hurt to find out what he wanted...

Gimp: Oh, so now you are answering me?
LG: I don't understand...

Gimp: I know you went to Nigeria. You didn't even call to say goodbye!

LG: Er...I didn't think I needed to...

Gimp: So all those conversations meant nothing?

LG: Say what?

Gimp: The least you could do was inform me we were no longer speaking

LG: We're not not speaking, I was just busy

Gimp: Good, because I was sort of hoping we could pick up where we left off, Gimp has been wondering what's going through LG's mind
(he has this annoying habit of speaking in the third person...which fucks me off to be honest...why didn't I notice this before?!)
LG: Nothing really...what do you mean 'pick up where we left off'
*laughs* you are funny...
Gimp: I'm serious

LG: But you can't be

Gimp: What is your problem

LG: I doubt I'm the one with the problem

Gimp: So you are saying you don't want to keep talking?

LG: Oh, we can talk...we're friends right?

Gimp: Do you think we were talking as friends?

LG: No, but you told me you didn't want a girlfriend

Gimp: At the time, yes

LG: Well, it doesn't matter now...

Gimp: Seen

LG: Word

Gimp: You are funny...

LG: Thank you...I get that all the time...

Gimp: I don't mean funny ha ha. I mean funny!..you frustrate me...

LG: Taste of your own medicine

Gimp: Huh?

LG: Never mind...gotta go. peace
*signs out*

Say it with me now....SATISFACTION!!!!!! :D

You guys remember my Ex?

Ex: oh yeah?..can u move out of the way, you're blocking the TV...

Yeah, that one...he did the same thing!...Almost a year later he was telling me I will never find another one like him...that no one will ever give it to me as good as he did...

well guess what?? I FAKED IT!

I said it!

LOL

I cannot for the life of me understand why boys behave in such a confused manner! I swear it always happens like this. Was I not good enough when I was interested? Why do you have to wait a couple months and then decide you want me? And it seems to be a common phenomenon...I know they say you never know what you have until it's gone and all that good stuff...

But you are just a big fat idiot if you didn't realise what you had when you had it because once it's gone...it might not come back fool!

Pardon my ire...I'm just annoyed...thank goodness for MP.....Sigh :)

ANYWAY

Back to the reason for this post!

The other day I was talking to MP and he was telling me how he loves the way I dress. That he was shopping online for some things for himself and saw some things he thought I would like...based on what he had seen me wear.

So, ok...I thought, that's sweet...I thought he wanted me to choose them and then he would pay...

but then he said those dreaded words

'So, I was wondering what size you were'

!!!

I know some of you are like...what's the big deal? but trust me...It's a big deal. One of two things could happen...

1. He could guess too small...forcing you to lie through your teeth and agree with him because you feel so flattered.

2. He could guess too big and you spend the rest of the day feeling like an elephant.


Now....if you are a skinny little thing...and you have no qualms about telling him you are a size 6...good on you....

But I am by no means a skinny little thing...I have copious amounts of junk in my trunk..feel me?

And no matter what anyone says...the difference between two sizes can be like the difference between being sexy and being fat.

Once it gets into the double digits...it just sounds big...Don't get me wrong...a 10 is a good size...but compared to an 8 it sounds massive...and a 12!...well...it's one size from a 10...but you can get away with a 10 because 10 brings perfection to mind...And some guys are just clueless...so to them all girls should be a single digit size!

So of course I didn't know if he was one of these guys...so that's when the question popped into my mind...

'To Lie or not to Lie'

But he beat me to it.

MP: You look like a 10 but because of your hips and bum-which I love-sometimes a 12
LG: *Silence*

MP: You there?

LG: That's about right...

MP: Cool...I love your size...those thighs...
*And the rest of this conversation is not appropriate for this post* :)

Yayy!!

I'm sure some of you think I'm crazy...but I have to be honest here right? And don't lie...

Some of you would have lied.

Shame on you

;)

XX